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Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Facebook in all its Infinite Wisdom, on Spanking

Facebook strikes again. Have you seen this in your feed?

"Have to laugh at people who are against smacking. My parents sometimes smacked me when I was naughty. . .I didn't hate them. . .I didn't have trust issues with them because of it. . .I didn't fear them. . .But I definitely respected them! I learned what my boundaries were, and knew what would happen if I broke them. . .I wasn't abused, I was disciplined. . .SINCE WE TOOK THIS SOFT APPROACH LOOK WHAT HAPPENED TO OUR COUNTRY & YOUNGSTERS *Re-post if you got your ass smacked and survived."

Thanks, Facebook, yet again, for your sage, all-encompassing knowledge on this topic. You sure showed us. 


See how much attention you just paid to that sentence? Obviously it works. 

Since the original poster of this message clearly wanted us to pay the most attention to the caps, let's start with that. Since we took this soft approach, look what happened to our country and youngsters.

I'm sorry. What exactly has happened to our youngsters that is a direct result of parents not hitting them? I'm pretty sure the state of our youth is the same as it was when I was a kid, in terms of that youth itself. It's the society that has changed. And who is responsible for that society? The people who "were smacked and survived." Of course, this argument only works if I'm willing to admit that spanking has had a direct entire cultural effect on the nation. Which I don't think it has. Whether or not it's bad for the particular child in question is a raging debate, and I happen to think it can be very bad. There are other ways to discipline. But whether or not you spank your child, I don't think you're responsible for THE STATE OF OUR COUNTRY (see what I did there?).

They're two different issues. Can discipline techniques as children grow up affect their adulthood decisions? Yes. Can those decisions affect the state of the country? Yes, eventually. Is not spanking responsible for the economic trouble, the housing bubble bursting, the drugs on the street, the oppression of whole groups of people just trying to get by? I don't think it is. That's quite the stretch, Facebook writer. 

Now to address the rest of the message. I think it's just great that you respect and appreciate your parents and their disciplining methods. It's clearly left you open-minded and accepting of others, which in turn makes you a good person. Oh wait.

There is a huge difference between sticking up for the methods that you use or that your parents used, and lashing out offensively at those who do things differently. How do you know those parents who do not hit their children aren't properly disciplining them? They know what works for their family, just like your parents knew what worked for yours.

Did you think you were going to bully parents into hitting their kids? What is the point of this message? There is no point. You're certainly not changing the tide of the country or our youth's problems. You just wanted to prove how tough you were? How much pain you could take as a kid? How much better a person you are because you were spanked? Do you think being spanked or spanking makes you a better person than those who do not practice that form of discipline? Pointing and laughing while making huge generalizations definitely helps get your point across, I would say.  I look at a message like that and think, damn, spanking really does work! Look at the kind-hearted, mature adults it's reared. If only everyone I know could be like this person.

I guess my biggest message with this post isn't pro or anti spanking. It's more along the lines of this: Facebook can easily make you look pretty stupid. Try not to take the bait. Just because someone got their "ass smacked and survived" doesn't mean they agree with this trite and twisted message. 

If you like this blog, please vote on Tales of an Unlikely Mother is number 18, just scroll down and click on the thumbs up! Thank you so, so much. 


  1. I hate the copy-and-paste culture on Facebook right now. I happen to think that spanking is just fine, but that's a stupid status and honestly, if you need to copy and paste someone else's words, you're not really thinking for yourself at all. Maybe your parents smacked the intelligence right out of your brain.

  2. I have to say that I spend very little time on Facebook anymore. While those silly re-post this if you agree status thing annoyed me before, now they just about drive me nuts. It seems to me that the majority of the time they are some poorly written, often less than intellegent or less than genuine statements.

  3. One of my relatives had done a list about having survived drinking water out of a hose, lived without today's technology ie mom yelled at ya to come in instead of paging or ringing cell phone. I laughed at that because I see so many kids with cell phones. I see the practicality of it we just can't afford cell phones so I guess I have to 'yell' for my kid to come in.
    Spanking? hummm depends on the kids, if they automatically start fighting back on you you NEED a different approach, I was like that, super retailation, my fight or flight was kicked into high gear so that whenever I get hit I hit back, no, what would have worked best was being deprived of something of great value to me. Put in time out I would have liked anyway as I was antisocial (I'm a touch autistic) my kids HATE time out and being put in isolation, even for a few minutes, that works better for me. I can lose controll if I allow myself to hit, that's another thing a parent has to keep in mind, staying in control. When stress and emotions are too high we BOTH get a time out. It all depends on what you can handle.

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