Gaining 50 pounds proves nothing to no one

So, more than a year after the Maria Kang debacle, I wake up to this on my newsfeed.

"Woman packs on 50 pounds to prove 'no excuses' for being overweight"

www.today.com

Apparently, a while back, Katie Hopkins decided she was tired of having people tell her she was "lucky to be thin" and blaming their obesity on things other than themselves. She got so tired of it that she decided to eat 6,500 calories a day until she gained 50 pounds, just to show that it's only caloric intake and lack of exercise that makes people fat.

The only thing her "experiment" proves to me is that Katie Hopkins likes to fat shame. A lot. So much that she would undertake a drastic change in daily habits--one that made her cry because she thinks eating that much is so disgusting--so that she could continue to fat shame. It's that important to her.

And, honestly, it's totally off the mark.

All Hopkins did with this little foray into the world of overweight was prove that she, as an individual, with a normal metabolism, no physical or mental ailments that would beleaguer her weight control, enough money to afford a good diet, her genetic makeup and a bunch of other individual factors that make her a candidate for weight control success--would be overweight if she ate larger quantities of food than her body is used to.

I'm pretty sure science proved that already, first of all.

And secondly, proving that you personally eating a lot makes you personally gain weight says absolutely nothing about the rest of the population. To get all academia, it's not replicable and it's not generalizable.

So, congratulations on making yourself cry and force feeding yourself to gain weight so that you could then go back to your normal diet, lose the weight, and continue to fat shame--now in your mind, justified.

Hopkins has also said, "I don't believe you can be fat and happy."

To which I point her to this Tumblr.

Maybe Hopkins can't be fat and happy. She proved that to herself (unnecessarily since she already knew that about herself), but just because she doesn't like the extra weight and had to put massive effort into gaining it does not make that true for literally anybody else on the planet.

We are all different.

Hopkins, of course, is going to lose the weight in three months time by again drastically altering her diet and upping her exercise levels.

And that's great. But it doesn't prove that other people can do it.

It only proves that you can.

So, now, you're not just a random ignorant person making other people feel bad because you lack empathy and education about the different factors in obesity. Now you're an active participant in tearing people down to make yourself feel better about your life, willpower, cultural situation and genetics.

Congratulations, and good luck on your weight loss journey.








 

How to Love Me - Guest Post

Melanie Greeke took time out of her busy schedule of wrestling her three lovely children to write an inspiring piece on body image that I'd like to share here.

...

As women, we are told how to look, what we have to do to achieve this look, and how inadequate we are if we fall short. This irritates the absolute shit out of me.

Women in a size small have a hard time finding clothes and feel fat in a swimsuit. Why? Because the media has given us unreal expectations of what a female body should look like. Size small? Not small enough. Super-model size thin? Too thin! Eat something, you skinny bitch. Size 10? "You'd feel so much better if you were a size 8." Size 20? "You have such a pretty face, I don't understand why you don't lose the weight!"

Because fuck you, that's why.

I had gastric bypass in August 2010 in an attempt to prolong my life because my weight and family history were leading me down a road I didn't want to travel, with two little girls who needed their mom to be healthy.

I didn't have gastric bypass to be skinny; I didn't do it to look sexy. I did it to improve my health for my children. And it worked.

But, even after gastric bypass and losing weight, I still feel the need to hide my thinner body. Oh no, the extra skin on my arms is unappealing to some! Oh no, stretch marks!

Melanie, stop it. Your insecurities are ridiculous. Let it go. You are absolutely the only one who cares enough to notice how much your "bingo wings" jiggle when you gesture your hands...and even if people do notice, who cares?  You know that shit is jiggling, too. Nothing to be ashamed of here.

So, I'm paving a new way for myself, and hopefully my daughters. We are going to love ourselves unconditionally. We will not engage in body talk or body hate. If we are feeling like there is room for improvement, we will improve, but no more standing in front of a mirror crying because skinny jeans make my thick Portuguese thighs look like sausages! No more will I allow the media to try to bamboozle me into thinking I'm anything less than absolutely spectacular. I'm going to love me for me. If I feel I need to change, I'm going to do it by myself and for myself. No man, woman, or TV personality will tell me what I need to look like.



 

What Is Up with Sizing?

I don't know what size I am.

This is not because I've changed size. I've been the same weight and shape, basically, since my teens.

Now, I started out in a size 10-12, but I wore my clothing much looser back then (per the fashion), and it was a revelation to me that I was actually an 8. And I'll believe it (why not?). I'll believe that I've been an 8 this whole time. Sure.

That's basically what I've been wearing since I found that the size fits me.

But then you get the stretch material. In stretch material, I can pull off a 6. Because of the forgiving material, I don't bulge, and the way the fabric fits, it acts like a little makeshift corset, toning and curving, not squishing and jamming.

Yay! I've gone from a size 12 to a size 6, just by wearing differently styled clothing. Amazing.

And I'll take it. Why not?

What I won't accept, what I cannot accept is that I am a size 2. That I am an extra small. What the hell? That's not even complimentary, that's just confusing.

Last summer, my husband bought me a pair of white shorts and a little black dress from White / Black. He checked my closet for appropriate sizing and bought me size 10 shorts and a large dress.

They fell off. Literally fell off.

He was so disappointed.

So, I went back to the store to exchange them. I tried the 8. Then the 6. Then the 4. Then the 2. I'm a 2.

The dress? I tried the medium. Then the small. I got the small, and it's still too big. But I just could not imagine that I would be an extra small. I should have gotten the extra small.

Me.

I'm five-foot, nine-inches tall. I weigh 145 pounds. I have 42-inch hips.

I think this gives a fairly accurate representation of my size.

This has nothing to do with self-image or confidence. I'm happy with myself. That doesn't change the fact that I am not a size two, and I'm not an extra small.

Vanity sizing is out of control. I mean, I know you can just try stuff on, but wouldn't it be nice to kind of have a range and not have to eyeball it and then be completely wrong? It's harder for me because with twins, I'm either shopping with them or during nap time, so sometimes I don't try things on at all. I just accept that I'll probably have to bring them back.

I'm thinking about this because I went shopping last week and got a skirt and a pair of shorts. They had two sizes on them. In Australia, they were a 12. In the United States, they were an 8. And I was confused. I ended up getting them, after asking the associate if the 8 was a true 8. She said yes, that the clothes there fit her in her normal size.

Lies.

They're too big. By far. And that's strange to me. Because with my hip size, I simply should not be smaller than an 8, unless we're going to redo the whole system.

Simply put, if I'm an extra small at Black / White, what the hell are the 50 percent of the people who are smaller than me wearing? Do they have to go to children's sizes? Negatives? Nano sizes?

I guess I should just relax about the whole thing and enjoy my new status as fashion-model size.

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