Lemonade is not for us

In all seriousness, why is Matt Walsh still allowed to write stuff?

He is a walking, sniveling garbage fire. He has never written anything that had any merit at all. His greatest achievement is a white man golf clap. He's got plenty of time to talk about abortion and women's health and what women should be wearing.

He writes for Glenn Beck.

Oh.

The only reason I'm writing about this at all is because there is one sole audience who needs to hear my trite bullshit on this: white people.

And they need to hear it from me because over the past three days, I have witnessed them trampling all over women of color who are celebrating this release. They talk over them. They ignore them. They continue to cling to their tone deaf opinions, actively denigrating the lived experiences of others. Doing what we have done consistently throughout our history, telling people they don't matter. Telling people their experiences are wrong because they don't match our perceptions. And then acting put out when there is pushback on their tired 1983 platitudes. The same smug brush off and blame that this album screams against.

Walsh's latest tripe on Beyonce was well expected and equally as yawn-worthy. Like, I can hardly manage to ramp up any outrage because his points are so insipid, banal and cliche. But, we'll try.

"Never mind that “Beyonce” is more a brand than a person. The lady herself is a person, but what’s presented to the world is a carefully constructed and marketed product. It’s a narrative, a story, a walking and talking fantasy novel for girls." -- Matt Walsh

So? So are you, Matt Walsh. Only replace young girls with old white men. No one is riding your ass about it. Perhaps because you are an old white man?

"I find it therefore annoying and confusing when people speak of Beyonce’s alleged genius, but the unwarranted intellectualization of vapid, empty nonsense is not the most troubling aspect of all of the Beyonce adulation in this culture. The most troubling aspect is that her music is called ”empowering.”" -- Matt Walsh

One would think all those three-syllable, literary sounding words would mask the intent of this sentence better than it does. I mean, that's an awful long way to go for WAAAAAHHHHHH.

White people, pay attention. Sometimes art is made that is not for us. We can appreciate it. We can LOVE it. We can feel like it speaks to us. That does not mean it's for us. Sit down.

Beyonce's Lemonade is a goddamn masterpiece that will last beyond the ages because it is a genre- and life-shattering work of art that speaks to generational history, societal systemic oppression and its effects within a personal narrative that spans the experience levels of most damn people, and contextualizes it in a form of media accessible to our pop culture.

Beethoven’s 5th is mere flatulence when stacked against this album. Even God’s most awe-inspiring artistic achievements – Mount Everest, Victoria Falls, the universe itself – all melt away in the blinding light of ”Lemonade.” -- Matt Walsh

Okay, like, you just look foolish here. Beethoven is probably doing fucking cartwheels in the grave over this album because much like Beethoven in his time, it is a musical venture that pushes the boundaries of all that has come before it. It is exactly like Beethoven, in fact. And it is exactly like the universe itself, in that it is a self-correcting mechanism thrown in the spokes of our white wheels to stop this damn train before we hurt ourselves.

Complaining that new music sucks very much makes you the Simpson's grandpa yelling at cloud. Stop it. You look crotchety and it's not a good look. Plus, your words are going to remain in history as the old afraid of the new. Just like we all read in the books growing up.
Walsh cries about these lyrics:

"Here are a few of the “unforgettable” lines they highlighted:

“Hold up, they don’t love you like I love you / Slow down, they don’t love you like I love you.”

“We built sand castles that washed away / I made you cry when I walked away.”

“Nothing else ever seems to hurt like the smile on your face / When it’s only in my memory.”

“I hop up out the bed and get my swag on / I look in the mirror, say, ‘What’s up?’ / What’s up, what’s up, what’s up.”

They're forgettable and washed up to you because they are not for you. It is not what they say, but what they mean to myriads of people. Someone who has been cheated on needs to know that other people also go through an illogical phase of wondering if they are not enough. Those same women want to feel comforted that they are not alone in remembering the good times. That Beyonce is doing the walking in Sandcastles is what is relevant.  And a woman looking at herself in the mirror and saying what's up is absolutely empowering. She is there. She is real. She exists.

The whole album is a scream: I exist.

Unfortunately, in Beyonce’s case, when her lyrics aren’t warmed-over and cliched, they’re vulgar, ugly, manipulative and destructive. Often they’re all five of these things at once. Granted, many pop songs are profane, mind numbing garbage, but considering Beyonce’s status as Pagan Goddess of Secular America, her garbage is all the more toxic. Especially when mixed with racial exploitation. Remember, this is the woman who gave us a militant homage to the Black Panthers at the Super Bowl. -- Matt Walsh

Racial exploitation? I got Bingo. You are so mad right now, though. Stop. If you don't like this visual album, fine. Sit. Down. Beyonce's life, choices, career and art do not need to pass your pearl test.

"For a piece of work hailed as “groundbreaking” and “brilliant,” it’s strange that the title is one of the most overused cliches in the history of cliches." -- Matt Walsh

He didn't watch the visual aspect of this piece, or if he did, he doesn't understand what family can do for cliches. The grandmother's speech in this film, "I was given lemons, but I made lemonade," absolves this cliche. If it needed absolving, which it doesn't.

Lemonade is a tribute to generations of forced silence, a rebellion against the conventional societal bonds that tie women, but especially Black women, to norms that exist solely so that we can watch them drown and then claim it was their fault. It is a masterpiece tribute to love, life, history.

It is a statement demanding the context we have stripped from generations, giving voice and meaning to those with only the raw power of vulnerability and quieted strife and shoulders of silent steel while deafening white America with its veracity and truth. It is opening eyes and shutting white mouths everywhere.

It is revolution. It is everything everyone has ever needed.

And the lyrics are part of that, Matt Walsh. If they do not make you feel empowered, then sit down. This is not for you. And please, have you completely forgotten the Somali poet, Warsan Shire? Of course you have. Her work, quoted in this album, lends it yet another level of brilliance, molding genres and reaching people where it counts. It is a literal lifting up of a voice that needs to be heard. But not by you. Because it's not for you. 

"Leaving aside for the moment the racist undertones and the fact that she dresses like a wealthy stripper, let’s look at what she’s actually saying." --Matt Walsh

Racist undertones? Wealthy stripper? Oh, wait. Actually, I've been wrong this whole time. This album is for you. That is why you are so pressed. Lemonade is for Black women, then Black men, then white women, and then Matt Walsh. Only instead of empowering him, it threatens him.

Matt Walsh is threatened.

Good.

I was able to discern 6 messages your daughter will hear loud and clear while listening to “Lemonade:”

Lesson 1: Use sex as a weapon to possess and to gain revenge.

Lesson 2: Find self-worth in your money and the expensive things you can buy.

Lesson 3: Speak with the grace and femininity of a drunken frat boy, saying things like “suck on my b*lls.”

Lesson 4: Never hesitate to f*** a b***h up.

Lesson 5: Express your empowerment with middle fingers.

Lesson 6: Eat corn bread and collard greens. -- Matt Walsh

My seven-year-old girls and I will take your watered-down, racist, whiny lessons and think on them. And then we'll go right back to listening to the real messages (many of which overlap with this list to be quite honest. I ain't sorry), and let you go back to crying in your soup with Glenn.

And there is so much of Lemonade that is lost on me. Because this is not for me.

This piece by Ijeoma Oluo is a fantastic starting point.

I don't understand the neighborhood scenery in Hold Up other than to know that it is breathtakingly beautiful and real. I miss all of the nuance because this is not for me. I don't understand the parking garage graffiti in Don't Hurt Yourself. Because this is not for me. I don't get the layered meanings of the different traditional dress and makeup. I don't precisely know what the heart-stopping tambourine is representing, nor the meaning of the cheerleaders/dancers in the poetic interlude leading to Don't Hurt Yourself. Why are they on a bus during Sorry?

Why? Because this is not for me, that's why.

On some levels, it very much is for me. But on most levels, I am not qualified to type a damn word about this.

The only thing I truly can say about Lemonade is to white people.

Sit. Down.

Enough -- Guest Post

I was white until I shed my skin,
Looked to depths of my cavern within.
Same was I to the woman, child, man,
Whose original shell was black, brown or tan.
Blood, bones, beating heart, thinking brain.
Walking Earth but a mere human stain.
Members of an anthropoid evolving race.
Sharing an overpopulated crowded space.
Colour of hair, shape of eyes, no more
Relevant if only to start a war.
Idolatry, false prophets, prayers to gods,
Proselytizing ideology competing, at odds.
Racist hatred blood shed, time wasted, lost.
Eviscerated humanity, and for what cost?
In end we return to dust, we disappear,
Gone with corporeal, prejudices and fear.
Equanimity achieved only in the ground.
Past due, hope for the living to be found.
History passes, time melts, into ether fades,
Till marching men storm carrying blades.
Cycle repeats, wounds unseal, hatred reborn,
Nothing learned, for our souls we must mourn.



(c) 2015. Naomi Elana Zener. All Rights Reserved.

Naomi Elana Zener is the author of both Deathbed Dimes and satire fiction, which is posted on her blog Satirical Mama. Her vociferous blogging has been read and appreciated by industry bigwigs such as Giller Prize winner Dr. Vincent Lam and New York Times best-selling author and journalist Paula Froelich. Naomi blogs for Huffington Post and her articles have been published by Kveller, Absrd Comedy, and Erica Ehm’s Yummy Mummy Club. She’s currently working on her sophomore novel. You can connect with her on her website or on Twitter @satiricalmama.

 

White privilege starts with the kids

I'm currently writing a piece on a course being taught at a local university, and off the record, one of the professors relayed to me this story, which I will now relay to you, here. (It's okay, no names).

This week, a woman professor had her 300-student lecture hall stand up. She read statements from cards, and the students were instructed to take a step forward or back as the statements applied to them.

Examples would be:
"If you've ever had to explain your hair, take a step back."
"If you've never been afraid of a police officer, take a step forward."
"If you've ever had someone ask you where you're really from, take a step back."
"If you've ever had someone react positively to you because they knew your parents or a family member, step forward."

At the end of the exercise, the white men were at the front, the white women behind them, next the black men, and in the back, the black women. The professor did not relay to me where other minorities ended up in the line.

To me, this is the obvious conclusion, but to most of these 18 year olds, it was a surprise, regardless of their race. Many of the less advantage felt validated, one saying, "You know, you never think of these little things, they're just your life, but they add up over time until they become back-breaking."

At the end of the class, a young white man made his way to the front, to speak with the professor after class.

He had suggestions for the professor as to what was wrong with the exercise and how she could achieve better results.

I'll just let the meta of the situation sink in for a moment.

...

Ready to unpack?

Okay, so here is a young white man, who after this whole exercise on privilege, didn't like being told he was lucky. Out of everyone in there, he decides without a second's hesitation, to question the woman professor, assuming he knew better, because his whole life, he's assumed he's known better.

The professor calmly recounted her history teaching the course, and her credentials to do so (which is what women have to do all the time to be taken seriously), in order for her exercise to maybe kind of hold muster against the ingrained beliefs of this young man. It probably didn't matter a bit. He probably has no idea that he just questioned a woman in a position of power. He probably thinks (and maybe actually would have) he'd have questioned a white man professor. He's entitled to, after all. He has ideas and merit. He knows this. And people listen to him. He's used to that.

That is the privilege.

Anyway, his suggestion? He wanted the professor to have the students close their eyes as they went through the cards. It was his belief that the people of color in the room were taking cues from each other to move backward as a group to make the difference seem more extreme.

I'm serious. That is what he thought.

And that is the same exact thought we come up against on the internet and in real life each and every day as we deal with trying to educate people about their privilege. Only they're not 18 anymore, and they're not nearly as easy to teach or as willing to learn.

This is the problem. And it starts with the kids.

We are post-racial America, and we are so mad, tho

Before Thanksgiving, I published a piece in Time that took the Ferguson riots and defended them in the light of the historical context of the country, calling out the systemic problem of oppression and asking that the problem of violence be tackled from that end, rather than from the easy-chair route of blaming rioters as animals or just bad individuals who like to ruin shit for funsies. Are those rioters animals and bad individuals who like to ruin shit for funsies? Maybe. I'm not talking about that. Whether they are or not, the issue of the political and societal climate that forces a population to its last resort to be heard needs to be addressed. This problem can't be solved by shaking our heads at it or wagging our fingers at the aggressors. It can't even be solved by helping the business owners get back on their feet (though that will help the community and the innocent victim of this cultural rage). It can only be solved if we look at the root racial problem in this country, open communication, and train both our law enforcement officers and the communities they protect how to interact with each other.

Saying this really got a lot of middle aged white men mad at me. Like a lot of them. They're still emailing me about this. So, I thought I'd round up post-racial America's response to a call for systemic change in the face of last-ditch violent efforts to be heard by oppressed and marginalized peoples.

Let's start with a set of emails from someone calling himself ghetton1gger (isn't that lovely?)

First he attacks the fact that I stay at home with my kids. Which is yawn. I've been in the mommy wars since 2008, and those women are more vicious than poor GN can ever hope to be. Then he invoked the "purple people" argument, amid a lot of other silly, worn-out arguments that say Mike Brown deserved to die.

You should be ashamed of yourself, writing an article that promotes rioting. Even for a stay-at-home-mom, this is idiotic. Your article hits all the hot buttons: unarmed black youth, marginalized voices, pen-up anger. This is the jargon of someone who sits on her bottom at home and doesn't have access to the real world. Here's the reality: Michael Brown weighed 295 pounds and was 6'4", he had just robbed a convenience store, he attacked a police officer, he refused orders to comply. And he was shot dead. Unfortunate? Not if you value law and order. Anybody doing these things--whether white, black, brow, yellow, or purple--would have been shot dead. It just so happens that blacks are far more likely to be involved in violent crimes than any other demographic group. Hopefully, you won't fall victim to black violence. Even if you did, you would find a way to rationalize it as the fault of society. Liberals like you preaching zero accountability are what is causing America to crumble at its very foundation.

By the way, if I ever did "fall victim to 'black violence'" I totally would blame it on society. So there's that.

When that got no response, he wrote me again, a full week later.

Perhaps it is time for you to write an article advocating law and order in the "black community." Negro thugs will continue getting shot by police until they begin to learn some very simple and fundamental lessons. 

Oh. You're so right. There is no racial stereotyping in this country anymore. I don't know what I'm even on about.

I have a bunch more emails, but I want to move on to my social media. So I will just leave you with this gem, which is hands down my favorite comment about my article. Email is from Dan.

You are a typical, liberal, know-it-all cunt. Your attempt to justify the savage rioting in your “article” by animals who do not deserve to walk free in this society is not only asinine, it is just stupid. I hope you continue to live in squalor. It is a shame that you have procreated because you are an obvious example of where a gene pool should end. Fuck off and I hope you burn your turkey.

Sadly for Dan, my turkey came out deliciously. Probably because I know it all. I also love "not only asinine, it is just stupid." Like my friend said, that's not only redundant, it's just repetitive. Please note that to Dan, I live in squalor. This is important because apparently on Twitter, I'm a super-rich lady, living in the lap of luxury.

Speaking of Twitter, let's go there.

Here's one of the more sane tweets:

Nov 25: @DLoesch @parentwin: There is no defense in ruining the livelihood of innocent people who did nothing to warrant selfish thuggery.

I hear that, I do. But that's not what I'm talking about. There is a difference between condoning riots and the havoc they wreak, and explaining the underlying forces that create an atmosphere where riots can exist.

Moving on, there are a ton of tweets where people who are so incredibly against rioting go ahead and advocate people riot in my neighborhood. Because I made them mad. And so, they kind of prove my point, don't they? And they haven't even been marginalized in society for decades. They're just throwing a middle-class, white man tantrum. "I DON'T LIKE RIOTING. THEY SHOULD RIOT ON YOUR MOM'S FACE."

Great.

Nov 26: Is @parentwin inviting rioters onto her street or is it only justified when black people are burnt out and looted -- http://

Nov 26: People should riot over Mike Brown in @parentwin's neighborhood. Let's see if she writes this then --> http://

Nov 26: Is @parentwin going to post her home address so the rioters know where to go after #ferguson is destroyed?

@parentwin @jtLOL I'm feeling a rage at the imbecility of this ruling racist Liberal. Rioting in her neighborhood is my only option. 

@parentwin One, you're a stupid liberal hag. Two, there is NO defense for them rioting. I hope YOUR neighborhood gets the torch. Dumbass.

Dec 2@parentwin I hope the first place rioters target is your family's home, you useless moron.

There's a lot of "they did this to themselves" and a lot of "Mike Brown did this to himself" out there, too. Lots of straight up racism.

@parentwin If they (black lives) matter so much why do they kill themselves in such high number? They matter SHIT to me until they matter to themselves!

Nobody feels riots are only option. Savages are opportunstic b/c they know police won't maintain peace due to "PC" concerns. @parentwin

Nov 26: @parentwin @TIMEIdeas .. YOU'RE CONDEMNING WILSON B/C HE'S WHITE ..NOT B/C MIKE BROWNS ACTIONS ..PLEASE FIRE THIS WOMAN!

@parentwin You condone violence and destruction of property. You are part of the problem. Brown catalyzed his own demise. PERIOD.

Dec 1@parentwin @TIMEIdeas Go ahead, walk your 2 white kids down one of those streets at night then report back. I DARE you.

Then there are the tweets stretching it to the piece promoting the destruction of black communities and calling me racist (which I am because I'm white and can never understand, and have really big metaphorical balls talking all over a black issue with my whiteness...but not for the reason they say.)

Nov 26: Elite white @parentwin defends burning & looting in predominantly black neighborhood. Not racist at all - http://

Nov 26: @parentwin IS THE TYPICAL PROGRESSIVE RACIST WHITE SURBUBAN WHO THINKS SO LITTLE OF BLACK FOLKS

Nov 26: @AG_Conservative @TMZ_Politics @parentwin If that doesn't sum up the soft bigotry of low expectations.

(As an aside, having high expectations for society is not the same as having low expectations for communities.)

Privileged white TIME magazine writer @parentwin encourages poor blacks to burn down their own neighborhoods

Grotesque white leftist views blacks as animals, which is why she can't judge them by human standards: @parentwin 

Oh, and they really didn't like it when I said I was racist because I'm white. Because not all white people, obviously.

.@dennisprager You nailed it: Self-loathing FTW. MT @parentwin "If anything, I am #racist because I am white.

@parentwin dumbass white apologist who voted for a prez cuz hes black..I feel sorry for your children...GOFY!

@parentwin Okay, sure. But this idiotic bit about how if you're white you're racist is ridiculous. You don't know jack about race relations.

And, of course, Twitter wouldn't be complete without making absolutely no sense.

Nov 27: @presidentlazy2 Darlena wants to enslave people and bring the country down. She thinks she can still watch Maddow & drive an SUV.@parentwin

Nov 30@parentwin Your Time column, while calling for lynching as punishment for self defense, does poor job of explaining why you support lynching

I also got spammed with lots of anuses, so, you know, there's that, too. Let's move on to Facebook.

There's Rod, who's convinced reverse racism is a thing.

If anything, I am racist because I am white." Back in the mid-80's, I moved from Canada to the USA. I didn't know what racism was until I moved to this country. Within the first week I was accosted and punched in the face at a streetlight by a gang of black thugs out of pure jealousy (due to a scooter I owned which my mother just bought me due to my bicycle being stolen by another gang of blacks). If I hadn't escaped, I'm sure they would have continued to pummel me senseless. Fortunately I was able to escape with only a bloody nose, in shock that someone would attack me for no reason at all except "white privilege". If racism = being white, then racism = being any color, and racism means nothing at all. Your definition of racism is empty, void of all meaning. Fast forward to 2004. My company moved their headquarters to the edge of town, where mostly blacks live, in order to prove how "progressive" they were. I was attacked on my way to my car in broad daylight by a gang of black youth. While they were beating on my car, I was able to escape and call the police, who rounded them up within minutes. I declined to press charges, but when I asked why they attacked me, it came down to the color of my skin. Now tell me again, who is a racist? Your article made me sick to my stomach. You are no journalist. A real journalist would be accurate and fair. You might want to read the code of ethics for journalists.

Bill thinks it's a shame I don't give out my address to get some of what's coming to me.

Most journalists are fools. Too bad that this yo-yo won't volunteer her home as a target of acceptable "Black rage"!

Jonathan is one of those who hates rioting. Unless it's at my house. Because I made him mad.

While I steadfastly condemn rioting and the destruction of innocent people's property and belongings that had nothing to do with the altercation between Wilson and Brown, if someone is going to riot anyway, I might think it makes the most sense to riot at Darlena's home and destroy her property. After all, she would be supportive of that...

Glenn is really concerned about my parenting.

Darlena Cunha is a former television producer turned stay-at-home mom to twin four-year-old girls. When she's not parenting, she's writing novels, freelancing, going to grad school BUT NOT WATCHING AND RAISING HER TWINS or blogging at http://parentwin.com.
There is no defense of riots, only in Ferguson it is evident neglectful parents such as Darlena Cunha abandoning her twin babies to write such inflammatory criminal statements should have visits by the Child Protective Services which apparently they neglected in the case of the Brown’s matured boy into a hooligan, thief and thug! Where are her twins going?

Jeff: "The idea of white privilege is absurd." Oh.

". If anything, I am racist because I am white. Until I have had to walk in a person of color’s skin, I will never understand, I will always take things for granted, and I will be inherently privileged. " Excuse my ignorance, but is not white a color? Also, the idea of white privilege in today's age of liberal extremes is absurd.

And there are so many more. So, so many more. This is just a smattering. Something almost all the commenters have in common? They are all white men. Seriously. 97 percent of these comments came from white men. The other three percent came from white women.

But really, white men on social media, you are right. The way we are doing things as a country with regard to race is perfectly fine, and everyone should just shut up about it, already. Obviously, you see no color and have no preconceived notions.

 

A Mother’s Hopeless Fantasy -- Guest Post

I don't usually run poetry, but this piece is raw, honest, and spellbinding. Thanks to N. Lei Walker.

...

Every mother wants to protect their child. 

Maternal instinct will have you be their shelter from the rain

Without any hesitation, jump in front of a train 

Run full speed into a blazing fire

Be their triple AAA, Geico, and spare to their flat tire

But how do you shield them from words?

Words can be more painful than 3rd degree burns

How do I preserve his innocence from the ignorance?

When stigma precedes actual contact

The sad realization is prejudices has too much of a profound impact

Keeps the world all contained but not intact

I guess in a way I want him to stay ignorant to the world

Let him think glass ceilings are actually glass ceilings

No need for it to be broken by a woman or a girl

So what do I say to my son?

A brown little boy with beautiful nappy hair, you know the hair that makes bubbles at his hair line before comb,

The child who knows wherever mommy is, he is home

How do I explain that in this day and age his reality of his beautiful friend who has bold brown eyes, stringy blonde hair that surpasses his chin

has more privileges, to win

I question, should I be the one to invade his candy land with the bitterness of this world?

When it’s the 11 year anniversary of Trayvon Martin would I tell him,

There is no iniquity in humanity

 It wasn't anybody’s fault on that rainy day of February 26, 2012

The gun malfunctioned in the rain

but don’t worry Trayvon didn't feel any pain

Zimmerman’s intent was to simply show off his rocket

In exchange for the skittles that were in Trayvon's pocket

There is something precious about the innocence of child. Who waves Hello on a crowded New York City subway without any intrepidation

And not show bias because of class, race, gender, and or education

I want him to stay inculpable and still manage to defy all odds, crush misconceptions, jump over obstacles, and just taste rainbows

Even the one’s in Trayvons pocket

When its the16 year anniversary of Mike brown 

The summer before college, to get him safely to his dorm

Should I explain to him the respective way to greet the cops?

Post up and surrender

Without mentioning, he maybe the assumed offender

 Should I tell him there is no such thing as the right place at the wrong time?

Its only right place at the right time

But be home a hour before the street lights

And don’t wear black and yellow together, blue and orange, and forget about red

Neutral colors compliment your skin

OH, and there are places where the sun won’t shine

So don’t cross that city line

Inform him, war is a form of protection

From New Orleans Hand Grenades

And the KKK are dressed up as ghost for the city’s Halloween parade

And then I wake up

To realize I will be his biggest enemy

My fantasy world has a huge penalty

Shaping a man to have no identity

In order to recognize the bloomed flowers

We have to be aware of their nonexistence in winter time.

To be continued…

N. Lei Walker

 

Riots may be a necessary part of societal change...until we change society

Riots are a necessary part of the evolution of society. Unfortunately, we do not live in a universal utopia where people have the basic human rights they deserve simply for existing, and until we get there, the legitimate frustration, sorrow and pain of the marginalized voices will boil over, spilling out into our streets. As ‘normal’ citizens watch the events of Ferguson unfurl on their television screens and Twitter feeds, there is a lot of head shaking, finger pointing, and privileged explanation going on. We wish to seclude the incident and the people involved. To separate it from our history as a nation, to dehumanize the change agents because of their bad and sometimes violent decisions—because if we can separate the underlying racial tensions that clearly exist in our country from the looting and rioting of select individuals, we can continue to ignore the problem.

While the most famous rant against the riots thus far comes from Kevin Sorbo, where he calls the rioters “animals” and “losers,” there are thousands of people echoing these sentiments. Sorbo correctly ascertains that the rioting has little to do with the shooting of an unarmed black man in the street a few weeks ago, but he blames it on the typical privileged American’s stereotype of a less fortunate sect of human being—that the looting is a result of frustration built up over years of “blaming everyone else, The Man, for their failures.”

Because when you have succeeded, it ceases to be a possibility, in our capitalist society, that anyone else helped you. And if no one helped you succeed, then no one is holding anyone else back from succeeding. Except they did help you, and they are holding people back. So that blaming someone else for your failures in the United States may very well be an astute observation of reality, particularly as it comes to white privilege versus black privilege. And, yes, they are different, and they are tied to race, and that doesn’t make me a racist, it makes me a realist. If anything, I am racist because I am white. Until I have had to walk in a person of color’s skin, I will never understand, I will always take things for granted, and I will be inherently privileged. But by ignoring the very real issues this country still faces in terms of race to promote an as-of-yet imaginary colorblind society, we contribute to the problem at hand, which is centuries of abuses lobbied against other humans on no basis but that of their skin color.

Sorbo is not alone. One of the Tea Party’s pages has hundreds of comments disparaging the rioters, bemoaning the state of our country, and very much calling skin color on the carpet as the culprit of this debauched way of dealing with the state of our society.

“To hear the libs, one would think that burning and looting are a justifiable way to judge negative events that effect (sic) the black,” commented Ray Hause. “I intentionally used black because of a fact that you do not hear of these events when another skin color is in play. It is about time that the blacks start cleaning their own backyards before they start on ours.”

However, the conservative group to which Hause belongs gets its name from the founding riot, The Boston Tea Party. For those who need a quick history brush-up, in 1773 American protesters dumped an entire shipment of tea into the Boston Harbor to protest The Tea Act, which colonists maintained violated their rights. In response to this costly protest and civil unrest, the British government enforced The Coercive Acts, ending local government in Massachusetts, which in turn led to the American Revolution and created our great country.

Samuel Adams wrote of the incident, claiming it “was not the act of a lawless mob, but was instead a principled protest and the only remaining option the people had to defend their constitutional rights” according to John K. Alexander, author of “Samuel Adams: America's Revolutionary Politician” (pg. 129).

That protest back in 1773 was meant to effect political and societal change, and while the destruction of property in that case may not have ended in loss of human life, the revolution that took place afterward certainly did. What separates a heralded victory in history from an attempt at societal change, a cry for help from the country’s trampled, today? The fact that we won.

In terms of riots being more common in black communities, that is true only when the riots are politically aimed.

The obvious example here is the L.A. Riots of 1992, after the Rodney King beating and verdict. I would put forth that peaceful protesting is a luxury of those already in mainstream culture, those who can be assured their voices will be heard without violence, those who can afford to wait for the change they want.

“I risk sounding racist but if this was a white kid there would be no riot,” commented Thom Nielsen on the Tea Party page. “History shows us that blacks in this country are more apt to riot than any other population. They are stirred up by racist black people and set out to cause problems. End of story.”

Blacks in this country are more apt to riot because they are one of the populations here who still need to. In the case of the 1992 riots, 30 years of black people trying to talk about their struggles of racial profiling and muted, but still vastly unfair, treatment, came to a boil. Sometimes, enough is simply too much. And after that catalyst event, the landscape of southern California changed, and nationally, police forces took note.

And the racism they are fighting, the racism we are all fighting, is still alive and well throughout our nation. The modern racism may not culminate in separate water fountains and backs of buses, but its insidious nature is perhaps even more dangerous to the individuals who have to live under the shroud of stereotypical lies society foists upon them. 

Take Jerry Lister’s comment for example:

“I believe the only way to stop the blacks from rioting is to film every person involved and prohibit them from receiving ALL public assistance for life.”

Instead of tearing down other human beings who are acting upon decades of pent-up anger at a system decidedly against them, a system that has told them they are less than human for years, we ought to be reaching out to help them regain the humanity they lost, not when a few set fire to the buildings in Ferguson, but when they were born the wrong color in the post-racial America.

 

How to Talk to White Kids about Racism - Guest Post

This is a topic I would never dare touch on my own. I simply do not know enough. But Cecily does. She's graciously written an amazing guest post about teaching kids about racism for me. Thanks, Cec.

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First of all, I have to start out by saying that if you are a person of color, you will face teaching your children about racism because you can’t avoid it. Racism will come up to meet them, and in preparing your children for the force that will influence their whole lives, there is nothing I can teach you.  Even if I felt I had the expertise to do so, I don’t have the experience to even attempt it.

That said, if you are white, it’s possible to never mention racism once to your children before they encounter it in school. White people are considered the “norm” in the United States and throughout Europe. This comes with privilege, including the privilege of not having to think about race and racism. White parents, however, have a responsibility to address race and racism with their children.

Unfortunately, it’s not happening.

A study at University of Texas in Austin, found that the majority of white parents feel uncomfortable talking to their children about racism. Even when given specific instructions to discuss racism with their children as part of the study, the parents told the researchers that they didn’t know what to say.

However, without guidance, children’s attitudes about race can get quite ugly or confused. Children, ages 5-7, raised in families where no one talked specifically about racism had racist attitudes about how nice black people are versus white people, for instance. So talking about it is vitally important. Obviously, I can’t give you a specific script to use with your children, but I can give you some pointers, based on current psychological and sociological research.

Start Young

Children as young as six months can tell the differences between skin colors and start to show preferences for faces that look more like their parents and caregivers. Some researchers believe that this was originally a survival strategy for young children in times when people lived in small tribes or villages. Over time, small bands of people tend to look like each other because of genetics, and giving infants a preference for people who look like their parents could increase their safety in such situations. Whatever the reasoning, however, the fact is that very young children notice the differences between people of different races. Obviously, we can’t have long conversations with 6-month-olds about race.

What we can do is expose our children to toys and books with different races represented and point out those differences for our kids. They notice them anyway.  Ignoring the differences doesn’t make our children more likely to ignore the evidence of their eyes; it will teach them that talking about how one character is darker than another or has different hair is forbidden or scary. Children are extremely sensitive to our moods and reactions. If you get scared when confronted with a question about race, children will pick up on it and decide that such questions are taboo. Treating such questions as normal extensions of noticing differences will mean that you are a step up when talking about racism with your children.

Work on Your Own Attitudes and Racism

One consequence of the sensitivity mentioned above is that children pick up on how their parents and caregivers interact with others. An Italian study in 2008 showed that children pick up on racial uneasiness between adults. The researchers showed preschool children as young as 3 videos with white people and black people being open and friendly with each other or being uneasy with each other. The children picked up on these cues very quickly, and were likely to take learned uneasiness from those video interactions and apply it to interactions with other people of the same race.

What this means for parents is that it’s important to confront their own preconceived attitudes and fears when it comes to people of other races. A lot of these attitudes and fears are not conscious; therefore it means making a real effort to notice how you interact with people of other races, and changing things accordingly. It also means talking to your children honestly about those interactions afterward, especially if you noticed yourself doing something problematic in front of your child.

An example might be:

“Did you see how Mommy walked into the office and talked to the white lady, but didn’t talk to the black lady? That was racist, and Mommy needs to do better next time.” Don’t be afraid to label racism for what it is, and don’t be afraid to be imperfect. That’s how we all learn, adult and child alike.

Avoid “colorblindness”

If you’re like me, you were raised with the ideal that all people are the same and race or skin color doesn’t matter. “We’re all the same inside;” “it only matters what you do, not what you look like;” and “everyone should be friends” are great ideals, but the truth is that they are too vague to really teach children anything about race or race relations.  Not only that, but they ignore the reality that racism exists and it affects different people differently.

If you live in a city or urban area, the likelihood is that your children see people of different races every day. Even in the most rural and segregated parts of the country, however, children are going to see people of different races on TV, in movies, and in their daily lives. The majority of TV shows and movies are going to carry the message that if we all try hard and do our best, we’ll get along fine in the world and with each other. This is an underlying message of colorblindness, that deep down we are all the same, and therefore if we all put some effort into things, we all have the same chance to succeed. Sadly, this is not true.

It’s okay to tell your children that they have an advantage in life because they are white, as long as you also tell them that the advantage is unfair. The best way to point this unfairness out in a way that makes sense for children, especially younger children, is to have a conversation with them about the entertainment they enjoy, especially the movies.

With few exceptions, people of color are generally sidekicks or secondary characters in movies, especially in movies aimed at children. This is because books and tv shows can get away with having a smaller audience, but movies have to appeal to the masses if they are going to succeed. The  general attitude is that white children will not identify with heroes who are of other races. Talk about this with your children. Point out that the only black character in “The Incredibles” shows up very infrequently and gets almost none of the story. Ask your children why there are no people of color in most animated movies they see. Listen to what they say. You might be surprised about what kind of answers you get.

Teach Your Children to Listen

The world isn’t very fair, but we want our children to be. In order to make them as fair as we can, they need to know what they’re up against. They need to be told that life will be easier for them because they are white, and they need to be encouraged not to just feel bad about it, but to use that knowledge to fight that unfairness when they see it, and to listen when they don’t see it, but someone else does.  Teach them to be humble around people of other races, to listen first, and talk second. And teach them that they need to take what they learn from listening and tell it to other white people.

Your children are going to learn something about race and racism from this world. There are lots of messages about it out there, from the idea that racism doesn’t exist anymore because Obama is the president to the question about why we don’t have White History Month. It’s easy, in such an environment, for anyone to get confused. Don’t just leave something so important to chance. Your children deserve the truth, and you might learn something too.

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Cecily Luft is a parent educator with a decade of experience and has studied human development at Cornell University. She lives and works in Tyler, Texas.


 

The Layers of Racism...It's Like an Onion, Really

Look, I get it, I really do. Some poor schmoe who gets paid like two cents a tweet for The Onion made a bad decision.

And it was really bad.

But I see where he was going. Taking the sweetest, most innocent, freshest and possibly most talented face at the Oscars--someone who was beyond reproach (because that is what would make the joke funny)--and using the crassest language possible to point out the error in the ways in which the Oscars are both produced and reported.

Who looks the worst? Who's drunk? Who's gotten botox?

It's all garbage, and that's what the man behind the tweet was trying to say.

But that is not what he said.

And to those of you blathering about how no one can take a joke, and we're all clearly missing the intention of the humor and free speech and blah, I've just started this post with proof that, no, I get it.

And I still hate it.

And I'm not even going to defend Quvenzhane Wallis, not because she doesn't deserve to be defended, but because those who supported the Onion's tweet are saying it's not even about her.

It's not about a young child, it's not about a girl, and it's definitely not about a young black girl. People who think it is are just obtusely missing the point. In fact, the supporters of this humor didn't even notice she was black!

First of all, yes you did. Unless you are literally blind and had no access to media during the release of the movie, and during the Oscars and really for all of time (in which case, you wouldn't have heard about the tweet) you noticed her skin color.

What you meant to say was this: Her skin color didn't matter to you. You would have made the same shitty joke about a little white girl, you swear.

Okay, so let's give you the benefit of the doubt and say you would have. Even though you didn't.

The problem is this: It's not up to us to say skin color doesn't matter to us. While it can be a grandiose step in what might be the right direction, it erases centuries of pain, hardship, loss and despicable treatment that is not ours to erase.

As bell hooks said in 1992, white people cannot reach out to black people to combat racism saying, “we’re ready now, let’s be friends. Subject to subject contact between white and black which signals the absence of domination, of an oppressor / oppressed relationship must emerge through mutual choice and negotiation.”

We don't have the right to say when racism is over.

Here's a comment from my friend's blog, the post to which I linked above: "You clearly have not reached the stage of post-racial."

No. No, she hasn't. That's the point. Neither has the person making that comment, although he (or she) thinks he has. "Color blindness" not only minimizes incredible strain and hardship in the distant and recent past for minorities, it also implies that the problems they face today are not there. It subverts efforts to bring about true equality by saying that what we have now is equality. And it is not.

These paltry attempts we make as white people to make ourselves feel better, to allow ourselves to prematurely congratulate ourselves on wiping out racism, are exactly that: paltry attempts.

“[Modern racism] eschews old-fashioned racist images, and as a result, stereotypes are now more subtle, and stereotyped thinking is reinforced at level likely to remain below conscious awareness” (Entman & Rojecki 1992).

My point here is that the little girl is black, and we cannot go around saying we didn't notice or that it has no bearing on the situation, as spectators. Maybe it doesn't. Maybe she will tell us that, or her parents will. They're pretty much the only ones who can make that call. 

Actually, that's not my point. That was my side point. My point is, yet again, that words mean things. And even though you meant the opposite of what you said, you still said what you said. About a little girl. For a cheap laugh. And yes, we all know that no one, especially you, tweet writer, actually thinks Quvenzhane Wallis is that word you called her.

And no, it doesn't matter.

Think before you type. There are so very few lines in this day and age. Why would you cross one like that? And I realize that the joke is damn near impossible to pull off if you use anyone but a child as your vehicle. Because people will take you seriously. And I think now we've all realized that people will still take you seriously. Because words mean things and even if you didn't mean those words, meant the opposite of those words, that message is still being digested by millions of people around the world.

And if there wasn't this backlash of know-it-ally bloggers fighting what we consider "the good" fight? And if the Onion hadn't been forced to take down the tweet and apologize? Well, how many 12-year-old boys (or girls) would have seen it and assumed that kind of language and message was okay, was funny, was cute? Because talking doesn't ever lead to action, right? People, especially young people, speaking words that they've heard those they respect say, that doesn't subconsciously solidify opinion, right? That doesn't normalize behavior, set an example, enhance a point of view, does it?

But maybe it does.