6 Tips For Parents Who Hate to See Their Kids Sick -- Guest Post

Copyright free image: https://pixabay.com/en/boy-cranky-sad-laying-down-couch-694763/

Having a sick kid in the house is no fun. It’s even more challenging when the sick child is not yet old enough to talk.

I’m an Aunt of over a dozen kids from teenagers to toddlers and a Mother of one adorable princess. I have my own ways to make kids feel a little better, and take care of myself too, while they’re lying around and sick.

Kids are so pure, innocent, and sweet. If we sincerely try to make them feel better they’re instantly diverted and start to pep up. Here are six activities I do to cheer up kids when they’re feeling sick.

Photo albums

I love to look through the old family photo albums and tell them who’s who. Having a laugh about the old-school group pictures, family photographs, and first day at school photos of parents is always a blast. We also pull out the wedding photographs of their grandparents or their first picture with their grandparents as well.   

Drawing, coloring, and painting

It may sound funny, but I’ve noticed that sometimes kids are more creative when they’re not feeling good. Maybe it’s because they don’t keep hopping from one place to the other every minute. They tend to stay in one spot to work on the project at hand in a more relaxed mood. It’s probably similar to how a poet can write a beautiful romantic poem when they’re focused and alone.

Classic games

My nephews and nieces always enjoy playing cards, paper projects, and board games. They even know some of the games of my generation or even older generations: games that almost none of their friends are probably familiar with.

Most kinds nowadays only know how to play dots and boxes or Sudoku on a touch screen hand held electronic device. They haven’t ever played on paper, or cracked open a Sudoku book of several hundred puzzles. I’m sometimes anxious to find out how my own princess will feel about these classic games once she’s old enough to play.

Snuggles and cuddles

My husband has an amazing connection with our princess. They can snuggle for over an hour. AIt’sa process that totally calms my daughter down from any fever or pain from her teething. I enjoy looking at them having their mom and baby conversations.

My connection with my daughter is different. My way involves a lot of jumping and playing goofy games – not always most appropriate when she is sick, but a blast when she is well!

Watching movies or cartoons together

I used to have so much fun watching old family and wedding movies with my nephews and nieces. We would sit and make fun of the old fashion trends. The look of surprise on their faces to see their parents as young teens was priceless.

Being the youngest child of my parents, I didn’t have much company growing up to watch cartoons with. I can honestly say I’ve watched more cartoons after becoming an uncle and a father than I did as a child. It’s so much fun watching movies or cartoons with kids.

I’ve also discovered some really good cartoons for babies while trying to calm down my princess. The funny part is that I’m still getting suggestions to re-watch the same cartoons while I’m working – thanks to my browser’s history.

Making origami

I’ve never been good at art and craft stuff, but I’ve also never stopped trying. It’s so much fun to make paper airplanes, boats, balls, hats, and golf clubs. I love sitting down with sick kids to coach them through complicated folding instructions and make something fun out of a simple piece of paper.

Although I know kids are likely to get sick often because their immune system is still developing, I just can’t bear to watch kids feeling sick. Seeing them ill makes me feel so helpless to the point that I wish I could do something that will ensure no child ever gets sick.

Of course, we always keep a close watch on our children to ensure that they get the care they need, and on more than one occasion we’ve had to visit an emergency room, pediatric clinic, lab, or urgent care center to get a professional evaluation and diagnosis. Through thick and thin though we always make it back home to give additional tender loving care (TLC) and attention.

Even though we can’t prevent our little ones from coming down with a nasty bug, we can try to divert their attention towards something enjoyable and fun, all while making beautiful memories with them.

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Zyana Morris is a passionate Health and Lifestyle Blogger who loves to write on prevailing Trends. She is a featured author at various authoritative blogs in the health and lifestyle industry. You can follow her through Facebook and Twitter.

Parenting by doctor

I've had poison ivy for two weeks now. I thought, as an adult, if I didn't scratch it, it would clear up and go away on its own. I was slightly wrong. Despite my ignoring the terrible itch, it spread anyway. First, I thought it would clear up, so I didn't go to the doctor. Then I had a conference to go to, and didn't have time to go to the doctor. Then I thought, well, it's got to be almost done spreading by now, and didn't go to the doctor. Now, 16 days in, I'm sure there's nothing a doctor can do, so I'm not going to the doctor.

Growing up, we never went to the doctor if we could help it. My mother was a nurse and knew things I just do not know. She was able to assuage our tummy aches and fears, and we waited out a lot of illnesses and injuries. She knew they weren't so bad, that we'd heal. As such, I hardly ever take myself to receive medical care. I know it's not that bad. I will heal.

But when it comes to my kids, or even my dog, I'm almost the first in line to go to the pediatrician's. Because I'm not them, and I'm not a nurse, and they can't really tell me themselves if it's just a bit of bad food, or reflux, or a burst appendix. So we go. Just in case. My kids suffered bronchospasms last month. A symptom of a virus that we could do nothing about. I spent nearly $1,000 carting them to the doctor multiple times, buying humidifiers and nebulizers and inhalers. Anything to help my babies breathe. What if it wasn't a virus, but asthma. What if it was pneumonia and the docs weren't catching it? What if it were the flu? They never tested for the flu.

It was a virus. It went away on its own (though the nebulizer did help. The humidifier, on the other hand, is holding on to old water and probably becoming its own health hazard, as we only used it once. Great waste of $70 for sure.)

The other night, my puppy started acting strange. He wasn't...biting me. He's very playful and hates to be petted (like a puppy) and he was just putting up with it. Moving more slowly. Not interested in his toys. Growing up, we would have just waited it out. A dog is a dog.

But I was so concerned I was going to call the vet the very next morning. I mean, what if something was seriously wrong?

I waste a lot of money this way.

A lot.

And thankfully, the puppy was back to his old self the next day, so I avoided those fees.

I always try to tell myself to wait it out, that it's nothing. But I usually end up caving and bringing my little things to their doctor. It's always nothing. But what if it's not?

An Open Letter to Employers -- Guest Post

An Open Letter To All Employers.

While I, myself, am not a mother, I work for mothers. Or, should we say in the past I have worked for them. Between daycare jobs and nannying jobs, moms have been my bosses for the majority of my work life. And there’s one thing that always comes up. And I do mean always. This is very much a solid happening. I get at least one call per month from a mother who needs me to come sit at home with her sick kid because the daycare won’t let them in and mom can’t stay home from work without being penalized in some way.

Don’t get me wrong. I don’t mind filling in for mamas when it comes to sick littles. But it’s not the same thing. I have a friend who will remain anonymous, along with her company, who could still lose her job even with a doctor’s note. Now, I get it … to a point. You need your workers so that your company can be productive. But how productive is it when you have four workers show up with various flus and pneumonias and other contagious illnesses that they are now passing around to each other. Nobody can ever get well because the moment their immune system tries to make a comeback, it gets hit by another germ.

As some of you know, little kids are germ factories. If one gets sick, they’re pretty much all going to get sick. You want to know why? Because they’re too little to understand how to taking universal precautions. I mean, let’s be real here - there are plenty of adults who don’t follow universal precautions themselves. How can we expect a child under the age of say … 5 to be able to take them. Sure, as daycare teachers we do our best to sanitize everything every chance we get. We seclude the sickies at naptime away from the healthy kids in hopes of creating a barrier. We even wash their hands and faces as much as we can.

But that’s not the problem. No, the problem lies with you, dear Employer. Because there are parents who have such strict sick day/personal day/time off policies that they will dose their feverish child up before bringing them to school. Do you know how long Motrin lasts? 6 hours. That means that if they drop their child off at 8am, we won’t find out until said child wakes up from their nap that they’re running a fever. And guess what? A fever masked by medicine doesn’t mask the germs they have. They’re going to make other children sick.

At the age of 28, I came down with a virus usually only seen in toddlers and infants because so many of my toddlers had it, that I just couldn’t escape it. And even though it was my own illness and not a child’s, it cost me my job because of how sick I was. My Hand, Foot, and Mouth turned into bronchitis which lead to me still running a fever. The doctor would allow me to go back to work and DCYF’s attitude is “well, you better be in ratio” so they had to let me go and find someone that could help keep them in ratio.

And again, I go back. I really do understand that you need your workers there. I understand that if they don’t do their jobs, you can’t do yours, and your company fails. But there has to be something that can be done. Leeways that can be put into place. For office jobs - let your secretaries and clerks and accountants come in on a Saturday to get work from the week done. Yes, I know, you’re going to have to pay them, but the day(s) they took off during the week were either sick time or personal days and in a lot of jobs, if you don’t have any hours logged, you don’t get paid.

If your employee can work from home, please let them. Maybe it’s not the most professional thing in the world, but it is the best of both worlds. Baby isn’t Patient Zero at daycare and while Baby is napping, mom (or dad, but I see this happening more with the moms) can get her work done. There has to be a solution that you, the Employer, can come up with that will make you, your employee, and the sick wee bairn (sorry, I went Scottish for a moment) all happy at the same time.

It’s tough out there these days. I understand that better than anyone. There’s so many unemployed people and not enough jobs to go around. So you, the Employer, can give the ultimatum. “If you can’t do this job, I’ll find someone else who can.” But you know what. Stop for a moment and think about that. Think about your employee. Will you really be able to find someone as good as them? Aren’t they with you company because they do good work and you like how they get along with the rest of the staff?

In the end, it comes down to people. We have to stop looking at people as employees and nothing else. We have to start appreciating their whole. Their value to their employer, their family, and to themselves. I bet more people wouldn’t need anti-anxiety drugs if we could all start treating each other like humans and less like cogs in a machine. A little understanding, in my experience, is going to go a very, very long way.

Kindness is free. Sprinkle it wherever you may go.

...

Bridget Frazier:

A twenty-something young woman who, over the years, has come to realize that hopes and dreams don't always coincide with reality. Take a journey through what it means to accept what life has given you, to be happy with the blessing bestowed, all while mourning the loss of dreams once passed.

Why are we always apologizing for expressing ourselves? -- Guest Post

Today I found out that I have Lyme Disease. It has already invaded my joints, judging from puffy tautness of my left hand knuckles and wrist. I have no memory of yanking a tick from my skin. But that’s beside the point.

Yesterday in my online journal I complained about how much my wrist hurt. Immediately after posting that I posted an apology for whining.

That got me thinking.

It’s a strange business communicating online. On Facebook we’re expected to put on public faces and post photos of our loved ones, or, save that, repost inspirational quotes or photos of cute baby animals. Online journals traditionally eschew that for intimacy with a handpicked built-in audience who will celebrate your joys, comfort you in your grief, help you solve an issue you’re currently experiencing.

One thing I’ve noticed over the years is how we’re apt to apologize for complaining online about something.

Doesn’t that sound weird to you?

If we want to vent, whine, or complain about something in our own space why do we suddenly feel the need to apologize? Is it because we shouldn’t express the, shall we say, less sunshiny sides of ourselves? Is it because we’re afraid we’ll alienate our audience? What if we can’t stop whining? Why do we feel we need permission to vent about an actual medical condition?

Maybe our support systems are too preoccupied to listen to our woes. Perhaps our friends live too far away for us to drop in for coffee and a chat.

Maybe we should just shut up, put on the proverbial big girl panties and deal.

BUT WHY DO WE FEEL WE HAVE TO APOLOGIZE FOR ALL OF THIS?

I sure as hell don’t know. All I know is that I’ve been diagnosed with a disease which, if left unchecked, can wreak havoc not only with my nervous system but also with my short-term memory. I’m already past the too-tired-to-move stage.

As I said in my online journal, I know, in the greater scheme of things, Lyme is a mere blip and it boggles my mind that someone as relatively healthy as me has it.

I apologized in my own online journal because I didn’t want my friends – my audience – to think badly of me. I still have that tiny “what if they don’t like me anymore?” shred left over from junior high. I don’t want them to think I’m tedious or I’ve branded myself as The Woman With Lyme. Ergo, I apologize. In my own space.

Heck, apologizing can just be as tedious as whining.

Here’s a thought: Maybe, just maybe, if we all stopped apologizing we’d be more apt to accept ourselves as the flawed humans we are.

I have Lyme Disease which now explains all the niggling conditions I’ve had for the past few months.

As soon as I finish this I’m going to take my first dose of doxycycline and call it a night.



And I’m not apologizing for it.
...

Kathi B. is a writer and baker living in New England.




 

That time I came fairly close to dying and thought I was just being lazy

If you know me at all you know lazy really isn't in my lexicon. So, this weekend, when I "just didn't feel like getting out of bed", I gave myself a really hard time.

"Don't feel like getting out of bed?" I asked myself as I lay there with my head under the pillows. "Sounds like someone wants to use the weekend to her advantage and play hooky from being a housewife. Because, oh, you have it so hard, wah wah wah. Have to do dishes and laundry and go grocery shopping and to kid soccer games. It's SO HARD to be you. What is your problem?"

Still, I lay there. (Although, don't kid yourself, all of that gone done except the grocery shopping and that's only because my husband wouldn't let me go. You'll find out why in a sec.)

I was seriously peeved at myself. Unlike the flu, what I was / am suffering from currently comes with a side effect of "malaise" which means "feeling washed out / off." So, I wasn't feeling sick. I wasn't even feeling too tired to move. I was literally feeling washed out. I wondered at one point if I was actually suffering from depression (not having ever experienced true depression, I have no idea how it would affect me. I was grasping at straws. I just don't lay in bed for "no reason", and yet there I was. I was searching for an explanation. From my bed, where I refused to leave, no matter how much I yelled at myself.)

I got no school work or writing done. I could not bring myself to care enough to sit upright to do it. Also, sitting was painful.

The malaise, which I thought was a separate issue, was actually a symptom of this other thing (that I'm not telling you about. Just think about the grossest thing you can imagine, make it ten times grosser, and that's basically what I'm dealing with.)

Anyway, by mid-Sunday, I could no longer bend down. I had to ask my children to get the laundry I had folded and placed on the floor because I couldn't reach it. I still thought this was separate from me wanting to be a lazy ass this weekend, but not being able to bend over, on its own, is reason enough to seek care, so I went to the weekend walk-in.

Again, I won't go into detail, but yesterday ended up being the worst medical day of my life. And I've had twins via emergency c-section, so...

When the doctor finally looked at me, she could not believe I was up and about at all, couldn't believe I had driven myself there, and couldn't believe how advanced the situation had become. And I'm just there like, what? I mean, I know I feel kind of off, but really?

Yes, really.

I have to be pretty careful for the next  little while, even, until I see a surgeon about this. I have watch my temperature, and make sure I don't get super sick or die of an infection. Awesome. Totally have time for this.

When I got home, I felt slightly better, and mentioned going grocery shopping, and that's when my husband was like, ARE YOU KIDDING ME? WHAT'S THE MATTER WITH YOU.

I'm glad he's around, because that would have been stupid. I mean, so we need milk? It will be okay for a second.

And that's the main point of this whole thing, even though it's all been about me and a rare, odd thing that happened to me.

It's applicable to the general audience, particularly to the moms out there.

Sometimes, be it a medical emergency or not, you're going to need time to recharge. A nap, a coffee away, even a whole weekend.

It's not laziness. You aren't lazy. You're so very hardworking, and you come down really hard on yourself, and there's no need to.

It doesn't matter the reason, and it won't be a permanent personality change.

If you need a break, speak up. Let your loved ones know. They will understand because they know and love you.

And, honestly, if you find yourself doing something totally out of character, don't try to bully yourself out of it. There is most likely an underlying cause, be it pure exhaustion, some kind of illness you hadn't bargained for, or, you know, a mammoth killer infection trying to take your life while you're busy calling yourself a lazy sack of shit.

Make sure you look around every so often, take stock of who you are and what your life is like. And then, give yourself a break. In all senses of the phrase.



 

Kindergarten Kids - Facing the Flu

Problem:

You've got all your normal shit to do, but suddenly you can no longer stand up. For three days, you can't move for the pain, you're feverish, and body aches doesn't even begin  to cover it. Then, when you do feel slightly better, you're weak. You can't stand for long periods of time. You can't raise your arms above your head.

Meanwhile, your kids are having blueberry fights in the living room because they're so bored, and mommy never comes out of her room anymore.

Solution:

The only solution for bad illnesses (I have the flu, but this goes for bad colds as well), is time. And you can't resent the time you have to take (although, of course, I do), because it's not going to make anything move more quickly. And when you start to feel better, you can't overdo it, or you'll be back on your ass again the next day (ask me how I know).

Basically, you need to take the moments when your brain is working (few and far between, unfortunately), and organize and delegate.

Anything that had a deadline, you need to change it. Get used to your house being a disaster. Have faith that you can fix it later. Ask your kids to work with you, if they're old enough. To make less of a mess or to go outside. Whatever. Have groceries and meals delivered. Trust me. Get only the essentials so it doesn't cost too much.

Importantly, keep your kids away from you. They'll want to be rubbing their faces all in your flu. Tell them no. Taking care of a sick child while you're dead yourself is hard. 

Wait. It will be over soon.

God willing.





 

VERY IMPORTANT REVIEWS

I have the flu. The real flu. Diagnosed with Influenza A yesterday, and I'd been unable to get up from bed two days before that. I had actually been too sick to go get seen. The thought of having to get dressed, or, you know, stand up, brought me to tears. Today is the first day I've been well enough to move around even a little bit.

As such I've been on my feet since 6:30 a.m. and I honestly feel like I'm about to die.

So, why the heck am I blogging?

Because I'm fucking pissed. This day has been a nightmare, and I have some reviews (good and bad) to dish out. And don't think I'm not going to social media these to the people involved, either. I totally will. Don't freaking mess with me when I'm about to pass out from death.


REVIEW 1 - University of Florida: C

I don't know what their official policy is on the flu and I'm too sick to go look it up and argue about it, but I emailed my professor yesterday after my diagnosis, and while she was plenty kind and polite, she gave me a three-day extension on a 25-pg paper that I cannot fathom starting right now. Because words. And reading them. In order. To have meaning. She gave me no extension on today's assignment which I managed to complete before what we will henceforth call HELL AFTERNOON started. Thank God. She also expects me on class on Monday. The doctor told me not to return to life until February 4th. I'll still be contagious. So, yeah.

For threatening the public health, and clearly not understanding what flu means, UF gets a C.

REVIEW 2 - My Kid's School District: A

I brought my kids to school today because they were BEGGING to go. I knew one of them should not have been there (tho in my defense I didn't know she had the flu because she'd been vaxxed for it. Twice.) I told them the minute she started showing signs of illness fatigue or coughed at all, to call me and have her sent home, regardless of the tantrum she would throw about not being with her twin. They called me at 9:27 a.m. and I went and got her.

For following instructions and caring about human health and the spread of disease their district gets an A.

Which brings us to...

REVIEW 3 - FLU VACCINE (nasal spray): B-

I'm so pro-vaccine I cannot bring myself to give this below a B, but seriously, dudes, wtf. My kids got the mist TWICE this year (because it was their first year for the vaccination). I know strains are different and blah blah blah, and my whole family is going to get vaccinated next year even though this happened this year because it's not the vaccine's fault. But it still majorly blows that we got the mini-sick twice in the fall, and still all got the mother-effing flu anyway.

For failing to protect my kids this year, the flu vaccine gets a B-.

REVIEW 4 - Kids Doc Pediatric: D 

I'm really sorry to give this one out because I really, really love the main doctor and his wife and their business. But, guys, enough is too much. I called in the early morning for an appt (righ t after they opened), and got scheduled for 2:15 p.m. I got there on time, paid my copay, and we waited for 45 minutes in the waiting room. What's the big deal, right? Sometimes doctors are busy. Well, the big deal is it was packed  in there, and they don't have a sick waiting room and a well one. Just one waiting room. And I told everyone we had the flu and sat us as far away from people as we could, but kids still kept coming up and trying to touch the twins because they look like the same person and are therefore incredibly interesting to the under 10 set. Also, we ended up right next to a six year old just there for his yearly. I wanted to die of flu-guilt. They didn't even have masks.

When they finally put us in the room, it was another 45 minutes before the doctor saw us. The room had a sticky mess in the middle of it and our sneakers all got stuck. Gross. I mentioned that to the doctor, and she was like, huh. That's weird. Then my kid wanted water. The doctor's office did. not. have. water. They gave her a popsicle instead. She didn't want it. I also had to ask them to retake her temp because the first reading was 95.7. The second reading? 103.6.

On our way out, I reminded them to call in the scripts. They forgot. But I'll come back to that.

For giving countless children the flu, making my daughter wait for 90 minutes with an ear infection, the flu, a respiratory infection, and 104 temp, Kids Doc gets a D.

REVIEW 5 - United Health Care: D+

While I've received great customer service every time I've called them, I'm going to have to call them again because somewhere along the line they decided to start charging copays for well-visits, and not only that, but they back-issued payment for all of last year. So the doctor's office tried to charge me hundreds of dollars and I had to be like lol no. I don't like surprise charges or back charges.

For trying to charge me for old money you weren't collecting at the time, United Health Care gets a D+.


REVIEW 6 - CVS CAREMARK: F

When my husband went to get vaccinated against the flu on Saturday (lol the day before I came down with it), they charged him $30. Flu shots are free. He called and the customer service rep told him it must have been an administering fee. Which it wasn't. He now has to call a bunch of different numbers to get the charge taken off.

When we paid for my tamilflu, we paid $100 deductible first, then the medicine. The next day, when I had to pay for my kids' tamilflu, they tried to charge me the deductible again. Calling customer service got a different person with a different answer each time. Now we have to call various numbers again to get the overcharge rectified. I do not have a million dollars for fake deductibles, Caremark, thanks.

On top of that, all of the CVS stores in town were OUT of tamilflu. Which wouldn't have been so bad, except that those stores weren't cool enough to tell the doctor when she phoned them in and waited for my sick-as-death ass to show up with my glassy, green kids to tell me, LOLSORRY. Not impressed. In fact, I actually cried at the fourth pharmacy to do this to me.

So, for failing every which way and making me hate them forever, CVS Caremark gets an F.

Which brings me to:

REVIEW 7 - Walgreens: A-

After running through my CVS options, I finally ended up at Walgreens, where, at first, no one was at the drive-through window. A man who was clearly off the clock and on his way out must have seen my stricken face, because he put his coat down and started my order for me. After that, a nice young man took over, and before filling all the drugs (which the Walgreens HAD) he told me they'd cost $70 a piece, which really sucked. I asked him why, and asked if it was because we had Caremark, and he smiled sympathetically and said yes. Then he filled our abx which was only $9, and instead of filling the tamilflu, he called every single CVS in the area until he found one that had it in stock. He transferred the order there, and I had my husband pick it up after work, (where he again had issues with Caremark.)

For being decent human beings, having medicine in stock and helping me even though you sold less drugs, Walgreens gets an A-.

Now, during this whole pharmacy debacle, my check-engine light came on and my car started shaking. Which brings me to:

REVIEW 8 - Honda of Gainesville: D+

After charging me $600 for new tires when I went in to check out a rattling noise a month or so ago, the dealership said I wouldn't need oil for another whole year because the oil was full and looked new. I'm too sick to go get the car checked right now, but without that rec, I'd have gotten the oil changed 1000 miles ago, bc that's when the sticker told me to get it changed. I'm willing to bet the $200 that Caremark is never going to give back to me that the problem with the car is the oil. Since I can't be sure, I won't fail them. But still.

For telling me my car was fine, and telling me to ignore maintenance stickers, Honda of Gainesville gets a D+.

And finally, we have:

REVIEW 9 - Grocery Mama: A+

After the day I had yesterday, just to be treated cordially and like a person was enough to inspire eternal gratitude in this small business. When I used it, I thought it was just a regular grocery service, which it is, but it's also way better than that. It's a local, one-family, business, and they are just doing everything right. I hope they have great, great success in everything. Here's what I left on their FB page review section:

Grocery Mama is amazing. I'm dead with the flu right now, and had to use a service for the first time in my life today. Within seconds of receiving my list online, the owner called me, clarified all concerns, and continued pertinent conversation throughout the trip to make sure she got what I wanted. Her understanding and humor was a breath of fresh air after a day of everything gone wrong. After the shopping she had to hand off the reins and called to make sure I was okay with a man dropping the groceries off. At every step, she ensured my comfort. When she couldn't find a brand I wanted she texted to see if another brand would be okay, and when it wasn't, she took time out to ask a store employee where the exact item was. My groceries were here within an hour of me ordering them. AND I FORGOT TO GIVE A TIP. They were so polite, they didn't even stick around in case I would remember. Please come back, Grocery Mama, bc I have all the monies to give you. It is unacceptable that such stellar service go tipless. I recommend that any and everyone use this service. They cater to all the local grocery stores too. I could not have had a better experience, and I was in a BAD MOOD, so that was hard to pull off. They're wonderful.

A+