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Monday, January 11, 2016

The non-existent gummies

My kids are smarter than I am.

It's true and it's scary.

I say a thing, and suddenly we're talking about an entirely different thing (usually which isn't even in existence in the logical realm). Today, amid dozens of things, we had a long chat about who WOULD get the last bag of gummies if I had any gummies in the car. Which I didn't. And I said four times we weren't going to have the conversation before they finally stopped.

You see, the other day, while Natalina was eating other food, Dulce asked for gummies and I gave them to her, unbeknown to both of us that it was the last bag.

This made Natalina very sad, as you can imagine, but she got over it fairly well.

Today, Dulce asked for gummies in the car, and I reminded her that we were all out.

Natalina piped up that if we DID have any gummies, they'd go to her.

Dulce disagreed.

I said we weren't talking about it.

Natalina explained her side of the story (which I already knew). That she had had one less gummy bag than Dulce, AND that Dulce had agreed she should get an extra one later, so therefore, it should be hers.

I said we weren't talking about it.

Dulce explained her side of the story (which I already knew) which was that it's a totally different day, and Natalina had had other food at the time that one day, and she really wanted gummies right now so why should her previous gummy consumption matter.

I said we weren't talking about it.

The girls continued in their separate lines of thinking until they were ready to basically kill each other and I had to be like, "Girls, you are fighting over something that does not exist. There are no gummies."

And the whole thing would have been fine if it sounded like it reads, but don't for one second think they said any of these things calmly or in an inside voice.

And I'm just over here like, WHAT IS GOING ON. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING. LET'S JUST NEVER EAT ANYTHING AGAIN. I CAN NO LONGER TAKE THIS.

It's been a long day.

If anyone knows how to make kids who do this, um, not do this, I would be eternally grateful.

Good thing they're cute.






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